Positive role models are so important for children.
How to create positive role models for your children? Think of your life and the role models that have impacted you. You would i’m sure quote a sports players, musical artist or a TV personality who has impacted your life. Someone you’d admire and want to be. Years ago role models were more mainstream, think Barbie and James Bond. There was a common interest and while arguably these weren’t the best role models, they were role models.
The Power of Social Media and the Internet
We know children no longer watch TV preferring social media videos and influence rs.
Children spend six hours or more a day on screens – BBC News
This is a world parents may not understand or be part of. Its a largely an unregulated world relying on the free speech argument. Online safety laws unsatisfactory, Technology Secretary Peter Kyle says – BBC News
Children can now easily find role models online and here in lies the problem. There is little or no regulation that prevents children forming unrealistic and damaging expectations due to the influence of role models.
If you think this is harmless browsing think again.
Kent headteachers back smartphone ban after Netflix’s Adolescence – BBC News
‘Boys formed Andrew Tate club in School’ – teacher
Our experience echo’s this where my 11 year old son starting quoting Andrew Tate to me. Talking about women in a derogatory way and using explicit terms. I was quite shocked but i shouldn’t have been surprised. This is the world they live in.
What did surprise me was that he didn’t take much notice of me. I was the positive role model and being ignored
When i tried to explain why Andrew Tate wasn’t a positive role model. What Andrew Tate represents and says aren’t good things, he looked at me and said i didn’t know what i was talking about. This wasn’t going to be a quick conversation and it took plenty of explaining to challenge the stereotype he had formed.
How to create positive role models for children?
Be a positive role model.
Now more than ever parents need to be positive role models. Check your behavior. Think about what you project to your children. Re-enforce your own positive behaviour.
Talk to your children.
Understand what they are viewing. Whet they are interested in. Who their friends are. Its not an inquisition, do it calmly and compassionately.
Discuss things.
If they mention a influence or belief you don’t agree with explore it with them. Don’t just shut them down. With my son it took a few conversations to put an alternative view across. I didn’t just say Andrew Tate was wrong as that’s my view. Its about understanding his view and exploring it to educate him and then re enforcing the education.
Be vigilant
Its surprising how quickly views from. From an early age. In the BBC report the boys were under 10. Social media and the internet mean your children are exposed to greater content at an earlier age. That positive role model may not be in your child’s life and you don’t realise it.
Check your internet setting.
If you don’t have child filters on, turn them on but don’t rely on them. They didn’t stop my son learning about Andrew Tate.
Promote positive influences
Use positive role models. Explore and share positive role models. Don’t force it maybe just put a picture up and let them explore. Use local clubs. Sports clubs can have positive role models and have positive influences built in. Boxing clubs teach respect and self discipline. Football clubs promote team work. Libraries usually have book and reading clubs. We have a great local art centre that does loads of half terms clubs and events to promote creativity and self expression.
Being a parent is difficult. Children are more isolated and online. Childhoods have changed. Its more important than ever to be part of their world and be the positive influence they need.
This article was written by a parent of three adopted children and so details or pictures cannot be shared but contact can be made through contact@cosychats.com
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